I hear ya. I wanted to get out a couple of weeks ago to. My tank had been idle for two years and I started "maintaining" and upgrading. I lost a couple of fish that had been with me for two+ years. I couldn't believe it, all I did was a few water changes and upgrade the sump. The water quality got better and fish died. After a few days I figured out what may have caused this and took it as a lesson. Even thought it sucks, don't give up. It's just a lousy lesson.